Mike Tomlin once said something along the lines of wanting volunteers, not hostages, to be on his Pittsburgh Steelers team. Too bad the AFC North rival Cleveland Browns didn't take that adage to heart.
Instead of sticking with Baker Mayfield after he voluntarily played -- and played poorly -- through multiple injuries, the Browns held themselves hostage to Deshaun Watson. They traded three first-round picks to Houston, and guaranteed him $230 million on a historic five-year contract.
Now you've got Cleveland radio hosts flipping out over Week 1 stat comparisons between the brilliant Baker and the dreadful Deshaun. The next day, another lawsuit alleging sexual misconduct added to the Watson-related misery for the Browns organization.
Whether the team's social media admin(s) meant to wish Watson a Happy Birthday on Saturday through ransom font by accident, or they're double agents doing everything they can to tear down that toxic football operation from the inside, the outcome was hilarious all the same:
Literally Google "ransom note" or punch it into a GIF machine and let me know if that style of writing isn't the very first thing that pops up.
The Browns could've had a graphic designer mock up any old thing to give their franchise quarterback a birthday shout out. I would assume multiple people had to clear this for it to be posted. I think that makes the "mishap" even funnier.
Well north of 20 women have accused Watson of sexual misconduct -- battery or assault in the worst cases. Cleveland knew this when they traded for him and guaranteed him all that money. They took it a step further by employing Jameis Winston as Watson's backup to show that owner Jimmy Haslam places zero emphasis on character.
Nick Wright did a fine job summarizing just how historic the Browns' self-sabotage is when it comes to Watson's contract. They kept kicking the can down the road to shrink his salary cap figure over the past few years. Now, Watson is on the books for a cap hit of over $72.9 million in each of the next two seasons (2025 and 2026).
You just can't make this up. Browns are gonna Brown, aren't they? Without fail.
Shall we see what some of the comments were like for the Brownies' happy birthday post? Yes. Yes we shall.
That's a mere sampling that omits the worst ones! Was being a Browns fan not tough enough before? The team had to go out and acquire the most hated quarterback ever? Yikes.